First of all, that's bullshit …

Happy birthday to Christine, Jessica and Meghan. I hope the day is wonderful for all three of you.

So time for some drunken ramblings. I haven't done this before, so deal with it. To ANYONE who thinks this column is too emotional at times … F off … seriously. This is me. This is jaylowe. If you don't like it, take your eyes elsewhere. I'm not here to please the masses. I'm here to write what I want to write. I'm here to do what in the blue hell I want to do. If you don't dig it, go read something about sports.

Bitch fest '02 … I've got a lot on my mind right now. Everything that I want to work out, just seems destine to fail. Don't get me wrong. It isn't a lack of confidence. I'm the best man for the job. I'm the best man for your heart. I'm just a damn good guy. I don't doubt any of those comments. But the thought of being jobless in one month scares the hell out of me. I've developed this new attitude … if it happens, it is meant to be. If it doesn't, same thing … it is meant for me to do something else. I don't mind this new look at things. Of course, I'll be very disappointed if I am jobless in a month. But I will eventually realize it is what is meant to be. Now this entire outlook could change if one of the job opportunities opens up. But we'll see. We'll be patient and see what happens.

First of all, that's bullshit …

Sometimes you have to enjoy life's little pleasures. Even if they are trendy. In true "High Fidelity" fashion (SEE that movie, if you haven't already), I'm going to tell you about my current top five musical "these groups are so trendy, it's just terrible to think you'd like them" groups. Now, I've been accused of being a music snob. I don't really see that as the case. I think of myself more as a music connoisseur. I'll listen to just about anything at least once. I know good music. I know good songs.

The people who keep me in constant wonderment are the true music snobs: people who just cast aside an entire genre of music simply because it is labeled as popular. Um, what kind of music doesn't strive to be popular? If I am a musician, making a career out of my music, then by God I want people to listen.

But I digress. I have promised you a top five, so here you go:

1. Goo Goo Dolls - These guys get it done. They make the music they want to make, yet still get mad airplay. If you take ANY of their CDs and listen to it, you'll realize half the songs are sung by one guy and half by another. Another interesting note, the songs they put on the radio, are all sung by just one of those two guys. The funny thing about this band is that those none of those radio songs sound anything like the rest of the album, nor do they sound like the roots and origins of Goo Goo Dolls. The Goo boys decided long ago that they wanted to make a career of their music. Obviously, they knew the best way to make a career of music is to get radio airplay. So they do just that. The write radio friendly songs and pitch those to the record execs. They get to produce an album with those radio friendly tunes, but they also get to put out their other songs … the other side of Goo Goo … to a new audience that probably wouldn't have listened to them unless they heard them on the radio. Great marketing.

2. Vanessa Charlton - I can't tell if I like her Jewel inspired vocals or her Alanis look, but this chick has it going on right now. Her radio single, "1,000 miles" has been getting constant play in my computer jukebox. Hell, I know it is a girlie song, but I can't get the freakin' thing out of my head. This song has taken over the "Jay Lowe Top Chick Tune", from Jewel herself. Listen to it, and then try and tell me you aren't hooked.

3. Lifehouse - I'm probably more jealous of these kids than anything. They are 19 years old, and making the music I've always wanted to make. The vocalist has a great radio voice, and the lyrics are solid. I thought these guys might just be a one hit wonder, but they are getting it done. They tour constantly and have some good tunes. If ARGUS had been smart about it, we would have started much earlier. Not that we'd have this success, but I find striking similarities in our styles of music. Maybe that's another reason why I enjoy this band right now.

4. Ja Rule - Anything this kid touches, turns platinum. Anything. I don't even know if he has an actual album (which I'm sure he does), but I do know everyone in music is getting him as a "feature" in remixes. Why? Because he's damn good. Forget gangster rap. Forget east coast/west coast rap. Rule … Ja … whatever … plays to the party crowd. If people want to dance in the club, throw in Ja Rule. His remix with J.Lo, "Ain't it funny," is tight.

5. The ChristinaBrittanyNSync Monster - Yes. I admit it. I am a sucker for popular music. Does that make me an awful music connoisseur? No. There are different types of music for different situations. I own good music. I'd put my CD collection up against anyone's. That doesn't mean I can't enjoy bubble gum pop for what it is worth. It's fun. It makes you bounce, and it's good dance music. These kids have voices, no doubt. They can entertain, no doubt. Do they have musical substance? Maybe not. Ok, so Brittany finally wrote a song on her latest album. That's a step. But they are making songs people can enjoy.

There really is no moral here. Just don't let someone else influence your musical tastes. If you like pop music, so what. Enjoy it. That is why it is made. It doesn't mean you have bad taste in music. It just means your tastes are more popular than that music snob who sticks to his indie music.

First of all, that's bullshit …

I don't believe in signs, and I never will. Things happen for a reason, and I'll leave it at that.

So, despite all my worrying about heading to Charleston last weekend, everything with the tennis championship came out OK. We had a challenging day to deal with Saturday, as Mother Nature decided to unleash her tears on us three separate times before we moved matches indoors. I was pissed when it rained. I mean, furious. All that planning and implementing. I suppose the weekend wouldn't have been as memorable had everything just worked the way it was supposed to. There are always challenges, but the Deacs pulled out their whoppin' sticks and won the regional 4-0 over American and 4-1 over Clemson. The next stop is Stanford, for the national championships. Good luck ladies!

Today is mother's day, and I find it only fitting I write a note to my mom.

Mom, I want to thank you for everything. It isn't just about constantly supporting me and cheering me on. It is about how you believe in me. You have instilled in me a confidence, where I know that no matter what, things will work out. I'm able to find positives in every day, and that is thanks to you. I get pissed. I yell. I verbalize my anger. All of the traits may not be the best, but you taught me to deal with them.

I've grown up an extremely luck person. Because of you and dad, I've had little to worry about. But you've taught me more than you know. You've taught me that it is ok to have emotion and to show it. You've taught me what is right and wrong in relationships. You've taught me how to love friends and family unconditionally. And most importantly, you've taught me how to be a giving person, yet not let people take advantage of that.

Everyone will say this today, but I feel like the luckiest child in the world. I will always appreciate everything you have done for me, every sacrifice, every second spent unselfishly. I will always remember that, and love you for it. I love you mom.

First of all, that's bullshit …

Finally … jaylowe HAS COME BACK … to his web page.

Two weekends ago, I spent a rockin' weekend touring the southeast. No, not with ARGUS. Just with myself. Hit Charlotte for my friend Hunter's Birthday, then onwards to Athens. There I was able to party "knee deep" style with my boy Tim George before he escaped the land of Bulldogs for Dallas and TCU. The following day was spent in Atlanta, where I was able to be at my good friend Jessica's wedding. I absolutely hate when I miss important events in my friends' lives, so it really was great to be there and meet some absolutely wonderful and charming people. My now email buddy, Kelly, is one of the wonderful people I met. It is good to know that such great friends and family surround Jess. And yes, I broke down and sang karaoke at her wedding … young mc, "bust a move."

So it's back to work hardcore. We are hosting the NCAA Women's Tennis Regional this coming weekend. The chances of us hosting NCAA Baseball increase each day. So I took it upon myself to flee Winston for 3 days, in hopes of finding some relaxation.

Do you believe in signs? I really am not one to believe in fate or signs, but after taking this trip I may have changed my mind. It all started Friday, as I was cramming to get as many things done as I could for the upcoming tennis regional. Well, Steve had one favor for me to handle Friday. All I had to do was pick up some tables and get them over to our field hockey stadium. I remembered I had to get those tables … at about 9 pm that night … in Charlotte. I felt like a total ass. I hate letting people down, and despite having a lot on my plate, Steve had asked for a favor. I let him down. I was already skeptical about taking the trip to Charleston, because I felt like I was leaving a lot of work behind … but my friends convinced me otherwise, and Saturday Laura picked me and Red up in Charlotte, and we headed to Charleston.

As we are making the drive down, it starts pouring rain. Sign number two. The trip was kind of a last minute idea, and I was definitely the tag along. The media relations staff had planned this for a few weeks, and I kinda suckered them into asking me (Thanks guys). So when it started pouring I felt like I was ruining their entire trip. Then we finally make it to Charleston, and we hit McDonald's. Sign number three … the McDonald's we stop at is proudly owned by the Charleston family, the Whitfields. In case you didn't know, that is the last name of my boss. Mind you, there is no relation there between him and the Charleston Whitfields (I think), but it just felt like another sign that I should've stayed at home.

So my friends, being the great ones that they are, encouraged me to just relax for a day or two. And I did. Charleston is a beautiful, old-south city. Very classic, very historic and very beautiful. I think my mom gave me an appreciation of historical towns when I was a kid, as all the family vacations were planned around which Civil War battle sites we could see that year. Regardless, I love Charleston. I'd work there, no doubt.

So the party of media relations staffers + one operations kid continued on into Saturday night where we went out for a nice meal, and then hit the town. Sunday was a little beach action, and then we all stayed in and cooked dinner. That night, we also decided to celebrate The Battle Of Puebla, Mexico from 1862 … well, Cinco De Mayo. We all just stayed in, made some Mexican inspired adult beverages, and watched movies.

Monday I awoke to the charming voice of my boss, Davis. That's when I knew that, despite not being in the office, it was back to reality for me. Since then, I've been working diligently to pull off this tennis regional, not to mention the Division III baseball regional we are hosting next week, as well as our own Division I baseball regional we will most likely host and the end of the month. Did someone say I had to find a job? Oh yeah, there's that too. Not really sure how I'll find the time to locate one of those job things, but hopefully something will work out. I've got resumes into Kansas, Georgia and Boston College. I am qualified for all of the jobs, so here's to hoping something works out.

And hey, if I don't find a job … maybe I'll just take that as a sign to go become an actor. Why? No reason really … I know I'd get to smooch hot chicks though.