First of all, that's bullshit …
So I was thinking the other day … about relationships and women … you remember the circa 1985 John Hughes film, "Weird Science"? It's just a funny movie about two tools who end up becoming the cool kids in their small little Chicago suburb town. Well, I don't live in Chicago, nor have I ever even been there … I suppose I could pass for a tool some of the times … but the idea of the movie made sense to me the other day. So our hilariously dorky characters Gary and Wyatt started cutting out pictures of different women … trying to make their perfect girl. I suppose they did this in the movie to become more social accepted … and to maybe get laid. So they create Lisa: this long legged, beautiful woman played by Kelly LeBrock. I don't know about you, but Kelly LeBrock was like a goddess to me when I was eight years old. She was just HOT! I mean, tell me you wouldn't freak if the first words Kelly LeBrock ever spoke to you were, "So, what would you little maniacs like to do first?" Anyway, Lisa spends the rest of the movie trying to give these guys confidence and help them out with issues from dealing with parents to friends.
So what really stuck out to me, was the idea of having this perfect woman. One you could just pick and choose what you wanted. I mean, I've dated enough women in my life to start narrowing down things that I do and don't like. And out of most of the girls I come in contact with, be it dating or friends, there are little things about each of them I'd like to see in my ideal woman … ideals, someone's laugh, someone else's smile, someone's legs, someone's sense of humor, someone's confidence, someone's artistic ability, someone's creativity, someone's passion … I mean, you yourself can probably sit there and think of different things you enjoyed or do enjoy in the different people you meet …
Gary: We're in.
Wyatt: We're in trouble Gary. This is highly illegal.
Gary: We need more input. We gotta fill this thing up with data. We gotta make her as real as possible, Wyatt. I want her to live. I want her to breathe. I want her to aerobicize.
Ok, so maybe I don't want someone who will aerobicize … but after sitting there with my small little brain, and thinking about how great this would be … to create this "Lisa" character ... I realized two things:
1. It's not fun.
2. It's not fair.
It wouldn't be fun simply because, it's not the chase. One of the most exciting parts of finding someone new is the feeling you get in after the first few dates. I mean, whether you can't stand them or find yourself really enjoying being around them, you get a feeling one way or the other. I don't know if there is a term for that feeling or not, but there should be. Maybe it should be called two-week bliss. Regardless, having this ideal perfect woman in your head just isn't fun. I think it can be totally destructive and not leave you much room to open yourself up to others.
And it certainly isn't fair to others. It isn't fair to that incredible person that for some reason REALLY enjoys you. If you are that other person, having to stack yourself against something you don't even know about is more difficult then getting up the nerve to ask for someone's phone number. Be fair … be open. Talk to as many people as you can.
Am I saying settle? No way. I think that is possibly the worst thing you can ever do in life, be it with relationships, friendships, jobs or just life in general. Always search for the best, that is what I think. But you have to simply remember, there are no Kelly LeBrocks … there are no Lisas. There are no women, or men, that you can just create on your own and have everything you want and desire. And chances are we are no Lisa for someone else. We are just who we are. And instead of living in some movie world where anything you want is at the touch of a keyboard, you live in a life where you can find someone who is incredible at any point in your life. But sometimes, you just have to open yourself up to it.
"Maybe it was a dream, you know, a very weird, bizzare, vivid, erotic, wet, detailed dream. Maybe we have malaria."
So I was thinking the other day … about relationships and women … you remember the circa 1985 John Hughes film, "Weird Science"? It's just a funny movie about two tools who end up becoming the cool kids in their small little Chicago suburb town. Well, I don't live in Chicago, nor have I ever even been there … I suppose I could pass for a tool some of the times … but the idea of the movie made sense to me the other day. So our hilariously dorky characters Gary and Wyatt started cutting out pictures of different women … trying to make their perfect girl. I suppose they did this in the movie to become more social accepted … and to maybe get laid. So they create Lisa: this long legged, beautiful woman played by Kelly LeBrock. I don't know about you, but Kelly LeBrock was like a goddess to me when I was eight years old. She was just HOT! I mean, tell me you wouldn't freak if the first words Kelly LeBrock ever spoke to you were, "So, what would you little maniacs like to do first?" Anyway, Lisa spends the rest of the movie trying to give these guys confidence and help them out with issues from dealing with parents to friends.
So what really stuck out to me, was the idea of having this perfect woman. One you could just pick and choose what you wanted. I mean, I've dated enough women in my life to start narrowing down things that I do and don't like. And out of most of the girls I come in contact with, be it dating or friends, there are little things about each of them I'd like to see in my ideal woman … ideals, someone's laugh, someone else's smile, someone's legs, someone's sense of humor, someone's confidence, someone's artistic ability, someone's creativity, someone's passion … I mean, you yourself can probably sit there and think of different things you enjoyed or do enjoy in the different people you meet …
Gary: We're in.
Wyatt: We're in trouble Gary. This is highly illegal.
Gary: We need more input. We gotta fill this thing up with data. We gotta make her as real as possible, Wyatt. I want her to live. I want her to breathe. I want her to aerobicize.
Ok, so maybe I don't want someone who will aerobicize … but after sitting there with my small little brain, and thinking about how great this would be … to create this "Lisa" character ... I realized two things:
1. It's not fun.
2. It's not fair.
It wouldn't be fun simply because, it's not the chase. One of the most exciting parts of finding someone new is the feeling you get in after the first few dates. I mean, whether you can't stand them or find yourself really enjoying being around them, you get a feeling one way or the other. I don't know if there is a term for that feeling or not, but there should be. Maybe it should be called two-week bliss. Regardless, having this ideal perfect woman in your head just isn't fun. I think it can be totally destructive and not leave you much room to open yourself up to others.
And it certainly isn't fair to others. It isn't fair to that incredible person that for some reason REALLY enjoys you. If you are that other person, having to stack yourself against something you don't even know about is more difficult then getting up the nerve to ask for someone's phone number. Be fair … be open. Talk to as many people as you can.
Am I saying settle? No way. I think that is possibly the worst thing you can ever do in life, be it with relationships, friendships, jobs or just life in general. Always search for the best, that is what I think. But you have to simply remember, there are no Kelly LeBrocks … there are no Lisas. There are no women, or men, that you can just create on your own and have everything you want and desire. And chances are we are no Lisa for someone else. We are just who we are. And instead of living in some movie world where anything you want is at the touch of a keyboard, you live in a life where you can find someone who is incredible at any point in your life. But sometimes, you just have to open yourself up to it.
"Maybe it was a dream, you know, a very weird, bizzare, vivid, erotic, wet, detailed dream. Maybe we have malaria."
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